I wonder if I will ever feel normal again. Did I count the cost when I decided to follow Christ? I'm thinking that I really didn't at the time. I can tell you that now, I count that cost quite often.
When God whispers another direction in my ear, I listen and I wonder what it will cost me. It's not that I resent the cost so much (that is at least true before I pay said cost). It is that I know there will be a cost. Following Christ costs. It just does.
And the Scripture makes no bones about it. In Luke 14:28, Jesus asks a rather pointed question of his listeners, "Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?" He is showing that if you don't count the cost you'll be sorry later.
The cost of following Christ comes in many unexpected ways. For example, today, a fun chic on one of my favorite websites recommended a particular blog as a wonderful source of humor. I trotted over to check it out and couldn't laugh. I just couldn't.
All the other blog readers reported rapturous hilarity. And I read a bit and then closed it and went away wondering.
Why? Because the language was foul and my Lord has removed my ability to even find that funny. Sometimes, if I'm honest, I mourn that fact. Ultimately, it is a good thing, but sometimes I wish I could enjoy the world around me without the truth filter.
I don't really want that, but I am hoping you can relate to what I am saying. Because here is the thing, I'm not normal. I don't laugh at the same jokes, I don't get my entertainment in the same way, I don't go to the same places or do the same things as most other people do. And that is a cost.
It's not normal to live the way our family lives. Believe me, everyone I meet feels quite free to say so in one way or another.
And that costs.
But.........
I have Christ, Truth, Life, Eternity, Joy, Wisdom, Freedom from Sin, and Power. All of these I have gained as a result of the payment of one perfect man on a tree and my willingness to accept it.
Living with and for Jesus-Christ costs a lot, yes... I have exprimented it, and I still do, as when I make decisions for Christ, my (non christian) family feels like I betray them...
ReplyDeleteLike you do, I don't feel normal, but even if it's hard to live, I like that, cause the prize to get worthes it :-)
Have a blessed day Ursula !
Yep, I definitely get it.
ReplyDeleteWe are, after all, called a peculiar people, sis. Welcome to weirdness. ;^)
Counting the cost has changed for us over the years, too. It used to look different. Don't know exactly how to describe it, but somewhere along the line it changed -- it used to feel scary to step out and trust and do what hadn't been done (by us) before. Now, it feels scarier NOT to. Faith is a strange thing, I suppose.
"This thing I do: forgetting what lies behind, I press on to the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus!" Phil. 3:13-14 It costs, but there's gold at the end!!!
Yes, we are different. We are set apart. We are adopted into the family of Christ. We are marked by His blood. And as a result we see the world differently.
ReplyDeleteWhen the cost - and there often is one - comes to my attention, I try very hard to realize what a privilege it is to humbly pay that cost. And to realize that what I give up, lose, walk away from, have taken from me is nothing compared to what Jesus paid on the cross.
Also, I think of the martyrs throughout the world, both from times past, and current, for whom the cost is so much greater. And I realize that what I pay is no where near what salvation is worth.
There is also a reward right here and right now - fellowship with those who are like-minded and like-hearted, who can laugh without being coarse, who see beauty and joy in what God has created, who count the many simple blessings as they walk humbly before their God.
You are not alone, and the price is sometimes high. But not as high as eternal separation from the only true and pure being that ever was or ever will be. It really is a bargain!
I love reading your posts!
i can definitely relate! i was just talking to a friend the other day about a tv comedy show. everywhere i went everyone was saying how wonderful the show was and how funny. so i turned it on the other night and had to turn it off in a matter of minutes due to the nature of the jokes...things i didn't think were funny at all.
ReplyDeletesometimes it is hard to be separate and watch as everyone else can share in something i can not, but in the end, i know it will be worth it all!